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Table of Contents

On Me, Writing, and Lovergirl

Another Kind of Monster is Born

Introducing the Queen (of Hearts)

On Hitchcock, Giving Up, and Being an Artist

You Don’t Have to Take Everything Off to be Beautiful

Keeping Sex Complicated

On “Real” Men

Rethinking Miley

Slut-Shaming: The Gift that Keeps on Giving

Interview with Steven Klein: On Art, Madonna, and Identity

Why Gravity Falls Flat

Why I Love Mindy Kaling

Honesty in Dating, R.I.P.

Mother Misfit and the Absence of Sex (Appeal)

I Was an LAPD Reject (part one)

On Miley, Disney, Elton, and the Lost Art of Creativity

An Ode to Love

I Was an LAPD Reject (part two)

12 Years a Slave, Torture Porn, and the Unfortunate Problem of American Apathy

I Was an LAPD Reject (part three)

I Was an LAPD Reject (part four)

Waiting for Hefner

Haters Gonna Hate

Deconstructing Dahlia: The FM Magazine Interview

A Self-Portrait in Stages: Part One, Or How I Ended Up in Berlin

A Self-Portrait in Stages: Part Two, En Route to Berlin

A Self-Portrait in Stages: Part Three, In Love with Berlin

Queen of Hearts: A Novel by Dahlia Schweitzer (excerpt)

A Self-Portrait in Stages: Part Four, Leaving NYC

Dallas Buyers Club: The FDA, Then and Now — When Did Things Get So Screwed Up?

A Self-Portrait in Stages: Part Five, Willkommen in Berlin

In Praise of Selfies: Work It, Girl

A Self-Portrait in Stages: The End & Beginnings, Berlin and LA

Dear Perks of Being a Wallflower: Thank You

Get Off Your Ass

I’ll See You Maybe: Our Culture of Unaccountability

Miss Longsuffering, Mr. Douchebag, and the Tale We’ve Heard a Million Times Before

Why Self-Publishing is Awesome (and Why Full-Time Writing Doesn’t Work)

The Politics of Sex(uality)

Dear Xanax, I Love You

New Year, New You: Just Own It

Can You Be Friends (with Benefits)?

Hey Guys, Carpe That Fucking Diem Already

Danger, Danger! Red Flags Ahead!

In Real Life, Images Are Larger Than They Appear

Faux-Lesbians, Victoria’s Secret, and the Case of the Missing CEO

Love is a Peculiar Thing

It Takes Two (to Watch TV)

I’m Back, Bitches — And I’m Bossy

Fuck You Pink

An Artist’s Manifesto

On HBO’s Girls and Hannah and Why She Matters

Kurt Cobain Twenty Years Later: After the Nevermind

Kurt Cobain Twenty Years Later: Moments of Silence

The Not-So-Magical Secret to Making Time to Write

Cindy Sherman’s Office Killer: Another Kind of Monster

How Alive Are You Willing To Be?

Dear Johnny, Rest in Peace

The Very White (and Very Male) Face of Late Night Television

The Myth of the Rom-Com-Romance (aka Don’t Touch My Spikes)

Pictures of You, 20 Years Later: A Goth Flashback

When There is Nothing Left to Say

I Am Hated For Who I Am

How Many Deaths Are Enough?

Why the Movement to Boycott Israel Disgusts and Disappoints Me

Armour and Artifice

On Being Queer and Jewish — And Why Neither Should Matter

He Wanted to Break Me — Or Why I Won’t Judge Janay Palmer

No, But Are You REALLY Gay?

What’s Really Missing in Gone Girl

Why National Coming Out Day is Really No Big Deal

Nikki Sudden: The Coolest Man in the Room

I Choose Olivia

AIDS Awareness Day

The Dangerous Lesson of Whiplash — And Why I Hated It

Baudrillard, Fake Boobs, and the Blinding White of a New Set of Veneers

Why Hillary’s Logo Really IS as Bad as Everyone is Saying

All Fury, No Soul: Why Mad Max Left Me Empty and Disappointed

Marilyn Monroe: Artist and Auteur

Why Your Hipster T-Shirt Doesn’t Make You a Feminist

Pretty Little Transgenders

On World Teacher’s Day, Support Humane Treatment of Educators

It’s Just Hair

Why Gaga’s Bowie Left Me Empty

Hillary Clinton Rewrites AIDS History

Office Killer with Cindy Sherman in NYC

Office Killer Finds Its Place

I Don’t Want Prayers. I Want Gay Rights.

Why Are We So Furious With Girls?

White People, Step Up

Minority of One

Where’s the Music?

Taylor Swift as Unruly Woman

#MeToo, of course

Enough About Harvey

OUT 2.10.18 — Going Viral: Zombies, Viruses, and the End of the World

LA + DC: Save the Date(s)!

Tempting Fate: Bringing Dangerous Pathogens to Life (in Our Backyard)

Introducing…Going Viral: Zombies, Viruses, and the End of the World

Our Government’s War on Women (and Free Speech) Wages On… Stop SESTA-FOSTA!

Let’s Not Watch Roseanne, OK?

Why Are White Women Unhappy?

Forget about Your Feelings. Look at the Facts.

Just Some Facts (About Israel and the Myth of Apartheid)

A Case for Clemency: Why the Menendez Brothers Should Be Released

The Problem With A Star Is Born

Why Shrill Sabotages Its Own Empowerment Message

“Mom, I am a rich man.”

L.A. Private Eyes Launch Event This Week (and More!)

Not Ready to Make Nice

How Madonna Became Gaga (and Gaga Became Stefani)

Tarantino’s Love Letter to Trump

Why We Need to Put Pizzazz in Impeachment (and Rebuild America’s Educational System)

When Dave Chappelle tried to make a room full of people laugh at me, it backfired, and they laughed at him. But I’m not laughing.

If Only Elizabeth Warren Would Sit Down and Shut Up — Then She Would be Perfect!

Pandemics, Contagion, and Fear, part 1

If fear is their lifeblood, why didn’t Trump and the Republican Party embrace the Coronavirus?

Pandemics, Contagion, and Fear, part 2

Pandemics, Contagion, and Fear, part 3

Pandemics, Contagion, and Fear, part 4 

From AIDS to Corona, Silence=Death

Construction Workers Are Not Disposable